


L’esprit de l’escalier

by fenHarel



Series: HSWC 2014 Bonus Round 2 [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dave is an idiot, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-28
Updated: 2014-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-06 12:46:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1858575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fenHarel/pseuds/fenHarel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>L’esprit de l’escalier (French): Literally ‘the spirit of the staircase’. This refers to the predicament of coming up with the perfect retort when the argument is over and it is too late to use it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	L’esprit de l’escalier

**Author's Note:**

> Dave could probably use some help getting his head pulled out of his ass, probably.

You're twitching while hiding on the roof.

You do look up to your Bro, you really do. But sometimes he just lands burns that are so sick that you don't know how to react to it. There's no way to really respond in the moment, you just stand there and gape because what the hell are you supposed to say to some of those things? Half the time he says something sicknasty in a rap while you strife, and it completely catches you off guard, causing you to lose the match.

Not like you've ever actually won a match. 

(But you almost landed a hit once.)

Just now he had caught you off guard coming out of the bathroom, and totally wiped the floor with you. He just materialized from above, and the two of you had a fifteen minute strife inside the apartment, and probably destroyed some of your furniture. He had made one comment about Rose and for fuckin starters, how does he even know that she exists let alone know the two of you well enough to say anything about it, and the next thing you knew you were on the ground with a shallow cut on your face. He made sure your face got patched before leaving, and you've been in stunned silence since. 

You're pretty sure that he left to go get replacements for the stuff that both of you broke while strifing.

So here you are, sitting with the birds, while mulling over why it is that he always manages to get the best of you. It's so incredibly frustrating for you; you have a million words that could spew out at any given moment, and all you can do is fall silent and stare at half of the comments that he makes. It might as well be a massive blow to your ego, and you know that your friends would have a goddamn field day if they found out you got all tongue tied and blank minded whenever he got the upper hand.

You can hear the door to the roof open, so your Bro must be back. If he's letting you know that he's there, he must be coming in relative peace. He sits next to you, and offers you a fist bump of broship. The two of you sit together for a few hours, and then he leans a little towards you and makes another comment about your feelings and Rose, and then he's gone in a flash. You stammer and flounder, trying to come up with a retort, but nothing comes to you and you want to punch yourself in the face.

Later that night, as you're laying down in bed, suddenly the perfect response comes to you.

You face palm hard and then wince at the pain.


End file.
